How Posts Travel: Relays Explained

Understand how Nostr relays work with simple analogies and interactive tools

Relays are the post offices of Nostr. They’re where your messages live and how they travel to reach other users.

The Post Office Analogy 🏤

Imagine Nostr as a network of post offices around the world.

• You have a mailbox (your keys)
• Relays are post offices
• Posts are letters you send

Here’s the key difference from traditional social media: You choose where to send your mail.

Traditional Social Media:    Nostr:
┌──────────────────┐        ┌──────────────────┐
│ One Big Server   │        │ Many Post Offices│
│ (Twitter/X)      │        │ (Relays)         │
│                  │        │                  │
│ Everyone in      │        │ You pick which   │
│ one place        │        │ ones to use      │
└──────────────────┘        └──────────────────┘

The Power of Choice

In Nostr, you’re not locked into one service provider. You can:

• Send posts to any relay
• Connect to multiple relays
• Switch relays anytime
• Run your own relay

Why Posts Don’t Sync 🔄

Here’s the most common confusion new users face:

“I posted something but my friend can’t see it!”

The Visual Explanation

Your Connection                    Friend's Connection
     │                                  │
     ▼                                  ▼
┌──────────┐                     ┌──────────┐
│ Relay A  │         ❌          │ Relay B  │
│ (wss://...)│      No link      │(wss://...)│
└──────────┘                     └──────────┘
     │                                  │
   Your posts                         Friend's posts

If you post to Relay A and your friend only uses Relay B, they won’t see your post.

The Solution: Connect to Multiple Relays

Your Connection
     │
┌────┴────┐
│ Relay A │
│ Relay B │  ← Connect to both!
│ Relay C │
└────┬────┘
     │
   Your posts → Reach more people

Most Nostr clients connect you to several default relays. But understanding this helps when you:

• Can’t see someone’s content
• Want to join a specific community
• Need to troubleshoot missing posts

Choosing Relays 🔌

Default Recommendations

If you’re just starting, stick with these popular, reliable relays:

Interest-Based Discovery

Communities often run their own relays for focused discussions:

• Bitcoin: wss://nostr.bitcoiner.social
• Development: wss://relay.nostrdevs.com
• Art: wss://relay.nostrich.art

Free vs Paid Relays

Free Relays

• Open to everyone
• May have rate limits
• Can fill up with spam
• Great for beginners

Paid Relays

• Usually require small fee (often 1000-5000 sats/month)
• Better performance
• Less spam
• Support relay operators

💡 Tip: Start with free relays. You can always add paid ones later.

Advanced: Outbox Model (NIP-65) [ADVANCED]

What is NIP-65?

NIP-65 introduces a smarter way to handle relays called the “outbox model.”

Instead of: You manually connecting to 10+ relays You do: Publish your preferred relay list once, let clients figure it out

How It Works

1. You publish a relay list:
   {
     "read": ["wss://relay-a.com"],
     "write": ["wss://relay-b.com"]
   }

2. Other clients read this and know:
   - Where to find your posts (read relays)
   - Where to send you messages (write relays)

Setting Up Personal Relays

For advanced users, running your own relay gives you:

• Complete control over your data
• Perfect reliability (no dependency on others)
• Privacy (only your data on the relay)

Popular personal relay software:

• strfry - Fast C++ implementation
• nostr-rs-relay - Rust implementation

📚 See our Relay Guide for detailed setup instructions.

Quick Reference

Common Relay Commands

In most clients, you can:

• Add relay: Settings → Relays → Add
• Remove relay: Long press/click relay → Remove
• Check status: Relay list shows connection status

Best Practices

1. Connect to 4-8 relays for good coverage
2. Include one “write” relay where you always post
3. Check relay uptime before relying on it
4. Keep your relay list updated as the network grows

Troubleshooting

”I can’t see any posts”

• Check if you’re connected to any relays (Settings → Relays)
• Try adding popular relays from the list above
• Wait a moment for content to load

”My posts disappear”

• Some relays delete old content to save space
• Connect to more relays for redundancy
• Consider a paid relay for permanent storage

”Relay won’t connect”

• Check your internet connection
• Try the relay URL in a browser (should show error/ws page)
• The relay might be down - try another one

Test Your Understanding

Think you’ve got relays figured out? Test your knowledge:

Still Have Questions?

Join the Nostr community:

• Nostr Reddit
• Nostr Telegram
• Stacker News (Bitcoin/Nostr forum)